THE BOYS DID NOT DO A Q&A AT THE EDINBURGH SHOW
HOLY FUCK I WAS FIRST ROW AT THE BOYS CONCERT
Oh god. OH GOD. Okay, so in their season of The X Factor, you meet Liam in 7x03, then Harry in 7x06, because both of them get full audition segments. Then you meet Niall and Zayn in 7x07, each of them in the context of not being able to dance. (Niall dances badly, Zayn doesn’t want to dance at all.)
But even though Louis appears plenty of times in 7x07 and 7x08, the show actually makes it all the way through bootcamp and the formation of One Direction without ever showing an interview with him or telling you his name or anything about him. AND THEN, NEARLY AN HOUR INTO 7x09, SOMETHING INCREDIBLE HAPPENS.
VOICEOVER: And one act desperate not to disappoint: The boy band One Direction. But as their performance approaches, there’s a problem.
CUT TO FOUR-FIFTHS OF ONE DIRECTION LOOKING DEJECTED:
WHAT IS WRONG?????????????
HARRY: Louis was in the sea earlier, and he cut up his foot. It’s swollen up really bad, and they sent him to the hospital.
This is already MILES more amazing than anyone else’s introduction. BUT IF LOUIS’ NAME FIRST BEING USED IN THE CONTEXT OF “THERE IS TROUBLE, AND GUESS WHO IS AT THE SOURCE OF IT” WEREN’T ALREADY THE GREATEST THING EVER, WE ALSO HAVE THIS INCREDIBLE SHAKY-HOME-VIDEO-STYLE FOOTAGE OF LIAM, HARRY, AND LOUIS GRINNING ABOUT HIS FOOT, WHILE LIAM POINTS AT IT JUST TO DRIVE THE POINT HOME. “LOUIS IS BLEEDING, HOW FUNNY AND COOL!” IDIOTS.
And then it’s still not done being the greatest thing ever to happen, because then they start cutting back and forth between the hospital, where Louis hops his way into the emergency room, and Simon’s, where we get an early look at WHY LOUIS TOMLINSON IS VITAL AND NECESSARY as the stress of the situation combines with a) Liam’s INABILITY TO CHILL THE FUCK OUT when faced with the prospect of getting cut and b) Harry’s nerves, leaving the boys to freak the fuck out without anyone there to balance them out.
DON’T TELL ME THAT’S NOT THE BEST DAMN INTRODUCTION YOU’VE EVER SEEN.